“Believe in yourself; have faith in your abilities, without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers, you cannot be successful or happy” ~ Norman Vincent Peale.
I have heard people say things like I cant speak in public, I cant hold an intelligent discussion, I am usually mute when I find myself in a group, I don’t know what to say because I feel I shall be laughed at. So you simply prefer silence because its safer for you.
do you find yourself in this category. when you have a presentation to make, you become too jittery and can’t seem to relax. Does it mean that you have already seen yourself as not smart enough.
Being confident is something that comes from inside you. You have to change your mindset, see yourself as someone who can make things happen. You tell yourself that the next person isn’t better than you, if this person can make a beautiful presentation or hold a discussion in a group then I can.
This starts with accepting yourself the way you are, be confident in however way you are, accept your flaws, your mistakes. It doesn’t even matter if you are dark, fair, short, tall, bow legs, rat chopped hair, fat, slim. When you accept yourself that way, people are going to look beyond that and see the inner you, the stuff you are made of and how smart you are, they would want to listen to you when you talk and believe me when people begin to show interest, you confidence builds up and you talk more.
Before you join that discussion or say something, evaluate what you want to say, go through it in your mind and when you believe its okay and sensible, say it, don’t just keep quiet when you have something good to say. Everyone mustn’t agree with what you have said, but the point is that you have contributed.
With time people around you will begin to appreciate you which in turn will build your confidence and you will find yourself engaging in brilliant and high powered conversations.